By Khalida Sarwari
Amid the flurry of STAR testing and making graduation and summer plans, the death of Audrie Pott may not be at the forefront of Saratoga High School students’ minds every day. But weeks after the 15-year-old’s rape and suicide grabbed world headlines, students and parents alike continued to wonder what happened, and why.
While emotions ran the spectrum, from grief and astonishment to anger and confusion, most agreed that nothing like Audrie’s death had happened at the school before and that things would not be the same again now that it had.
“Everyone talks about how we live in a bubble. Everyone’s kind of absorbed in their world here,” Gabriela Romo, a 17-year-old junior, said. “I think it is a little bit broken for everyone. They realize these horrible things can happen in their little bubble.”
The strength of that “bubble” was tested in September 2012 when, eight days after a party at a friend’s home in Saratoga, Audrie took her life. A wrongful death suit filed in April by Audrie’s family against three 16-year-old boys and the owners of the home where the party took place claims the boys raped Audrie while she was intoxicated and unconscious. The boys are accused of committing the act while sober and using a marker to draw on and write sexually explicit messages on Audrie’s body and then electronically distributing at least one photo of the sexual assault to other students in the school.
The identities of the boys have not been released because they are minors, but all three were schoolmates and friends of Audrie, the family claims. After a stint in juvenile hall, the boys were placed on house arrest as they face charges of sexual battery and distribution of child pornography in connection with the case.
In the aftermath of the tragedy, as the Pott family and Saratoga community at large began looking for clues and answers, some questioned the school district’s denial of cyber-bullying being a factor in Audrie’s suicide and criticized school principal Paul Robinson’s handling of the case. When news of her death was initially reported, Robinson told the Saratoga News that the rumors of her taking her life due to sexual assault and bullying were “as far from the truth as it can be” and that her death was and would likely remain a mystery.
One of Robinson’s critics is Guisella Nilo, who said Audrie’s death hit close to home because of how close in age Audrie was to her daughter Gabriela, a Saratoga High student.
The day Gabriela opened up to her about Audrie’s death, she had tears in her eyes, Nilo said. That’s the first time she had heard about Audrie. The next time was at a band concert, where prior to the start of the program, Robinson stood up to acknowledge Audrie’s death, but in vague terms. If someone had just dropped by without having any knowledge of the incident, they would have had no clue about what he was talking about, she said.
The statements he made to the media later didn’t help his case, Nilo said.
“Even then, without knowing anything, I said, ‘Why would you say anything like that without knowing the facts?’ ”
Once the pieces of the puzzle were gathered, Nilo began questioning why Robinson and the school administration hadn’t been more straightforward with the students and parents.
“For me, the school tried to protect an image and tried to keep it as quiet as possible,” she said.
Gabriela said she wishes the school had addressed the issue of bullying at the time. Earlier this year, Saratoga High held a “Just be Kind” week, where students were encouraged to do good deeds that promoted respect toward their classmates. The week was beneficial to her and other students, Gabriela said, but it didn’t seem like it was enough.
“I wish we could have been more united as a school,” she said. “There were no assemblies or congregation of the school just to talk about [Audrie’s death]. We deserve to know what’s going on.”
Like others, Gabriela heard the rumors from her friends at school, but with the exception of her band director Michael Boitz, she didn’t hear any mention of what had happened to Audrie from other members of the faculty or administration.
“We should be hearing from the adults, the authority figures in our school,” Gabriela said.
She said she was aware of the counseling services offered at the school to help students cope with Audrie’s loss, and while some of her friends took advantage of them, she chose not to.
Not everyone at the school shares Gabriela and her mother’s sentiments. Some students and parents defended Robinson and the district’s actions. One parent of a 14-year-old freshman boy who shared a class with Audrie said it’s just as likely that the school may not have known as much about the incident at the time as some claim. And even if it did, she said, what more could the school have done?
Moreover, she said while the well-being of students should be of importance to all, it is more so the responsibility of parents to ensure that their children are safe. The foundation for morals and values are established inside the home, and parents should take time to talk to their kids regularly to find out what’s going on in their lives, said the boy’s mother, who asked not to be named.
“To blame the principal is really unfair to him,” said an 18-year-old senior, who also asked not to be named. The accusations against Robinson and the school district are not only unfair, she said, but inaccurate, since Audrie “didn’t tell anyone. No one knew about it.”
A 16-year-old junior, speaking anonymously, said he doesn’t believe the school was at fault and defended Robinson’s actions.
“He’s a great guy,” he said. “It’s not his fault whatsoever. I highly doubt he even knew back then.”
Mixed emotions and reactions continue to surround the school district’s controversial response to the tragedy, but students and parents are also divided on the issue of bullying, and more specifically, cyber-bullying. Just how big of a problem those issues are depends on whom you ask.
Gabriela said that while she doesn’t see it happening with her own eyes, “I know it happens.” Some students will say things behind other students’ backs or make judgmental remarks, she added and there were a number of students who didn’t seem to take “Just Be Kind” week seriously. And some of it isn’t even face-to-face; it happens online, the sneakiest form of bullying, Gabriela said.
“Those kinds of things shouldn’t be censored,” she said, listing rape, death, suicide and drugs as topics that she’d like to see the school address. “People get kind of squeamish and uncomfortable about talking about it, but that’s why we need to talk about it.”
Another student, a 16-year-old sophomore and acquaintance of Audrie who asked not to be named, disagreed. “This school is really, really good about bullying,” the boy said. “It’s a great community. I think that’s why this shocks us the most. We take care of one another.”
The 18-year-old senior said that while she sympathizes with the Pott family, she believes Audrie’s experience with bullying was unique.
“It is an isolated event, and second of all, it’s completely unrepresentative of the whole student body,” she said.
Whether it’s a small or big problem, it appears even a school the caliber of Saratoga High is not exempt from the bullying issue. While there is disagreement about the degree to which it is a problem, many would likely share the bewilderment expressed by Jun Gao, the father of a freshman male student at the school.
“It doesn’t seem possible,” Gao said. “The kids here are so friendly. I don’t understand how something like that could happen.”
Saratoga students, parents still wonder what happened, and why
